ALWAYS A SCANDAL

Ready, Set, Legislate.

2012-01-20T12:11:00.000-08:00

Started work in this building yesterday.

It's eerily quiet, but that will all change Monday.

Badge? Check. Suit pants? Check. Awkward bathroom photo? ...Check.

Our office, where @spnitz86 and I live.

Hi there, hello.

2012-01-10T22:35:00.000-08:00

In case you thought any harm or ill will fell upon me New Year's Eve, be comforted that is not the case. I have not blogged because I have been very busy being a lazy bum, that is, until I start my new job!

Rewind.

I had a fabulous New Year's Eve evening with Katie and Alana(good luck Miss NV!) And, I had the great pleasure of being so tall I could see over the heads of most, if not all, of the people dancing.

After exhausting my parent's hospitality, and watching the entire first season of Downton Abbey(WATCH IT NOW), Katie and I returned to a real treat: a snowless Provo.

But here's the exciting part:

I'm not taking classes this semester! Isn't it wonderful? I'm a beauty school drop out!

Just kidding. I deferred for a semester because starting next Thursday I'll be a communications coordinator for the Utah House of Representatives! I'm so excited I literally wish I could start tomorrow. It may or may not be the greatest job on earth.

Why, you ask?

Oh because I get to wear suit pants. And I have a badge. Also, free fountain drinks. My own office is thrown somewhere in there too. But really because I get to go to meetings in this beautiful building:

Just walking inside makes you feel more important.

If you use Twitter and you want to know what we're up to, follow @UtahReps. (I'll be the one tweeting, what what.)

PS- Did I mention suit pants?

2011

2011-12-29T01:14:00.000-08:00

I am not always kind when it comes time to review the year. I have a terrible habit of only remembering the difficult, the sad, or the frustrating. Now I won't pretend that 2011 was my best year and I won't pretend it was the happiest, because it wasn't either of those two things. But I also can't ignore what I was given. So thank you 2011 for:

Liberty Park Tennis Center

There was no better place to spend my summer.

Weddings

I have been to so many weddings. But they were all great, seriously. There is something so happy about seeing your best friends find and commit to that person so perfect for them.

Being reminded of what I'm passionate about

Sometimes we settle for what will be the easiest, the quickest, or the most practical. One of the greatest feelings is realizing that you love something, and that something is the easiest, quickest, and most practical. Long live political science.

A trip to the Mall of America

It was everything I hoped it would be.

The world's best roommates

I'm about 100% sure my roommates don't read my blog, but if they happen to see this I want them to know they are the greatest. All 3 of them are kind, strong, intelligent, beautiful women and I am lucky to share a kitchen with them.

Wednesday trips to the Temple

Baptisms and dinner with Katie are the best 4 hours of the week.

Parties

I'm happy my roommates are always up for them, and I'm happy people come when we do the hosting.

Family History

I am doing it. And it's a great calling.

Professors

I am thankful for professors that take a vested interest in me.

Love

I just love it.

New Friends

Between my ward, my classes, and friends of friends I have met some fantastic people.

Guest Speakers

Somehow they always seem to be doing exactly what I want to do, and are willing to answer all my questions.

A plan

I have one now. I have hopes, dreams, and ambitious goals. It's great.

Quality family time

Mom, Dad, Emily, Hailey and Ally. I love them and I love when we're all in the same car.

Nordstrom Rack

Heaven sent. Don't believe me? Two words. Jimmy. Choo.

Peace

With myself, with where I am, with where I'm going.

2011 was good, but 2012 will be better.

A litte ward Christmas party for you.

2011-12-14T21:47:00.000-08:00

World Gingerbread Competition Part 2

2011-12-13T11:24:00.000-08:00

A few weeks ago our ward had an auction, and my roommates and I entered the dating raffle. And well, we won 3 handsome men. We had the privilege of taking them out, and we decided to do yet another gingerbread competition. Same rules, same materials, new teams, and a new world champion.

The Contestants:

Team 1:

Me and Stew

Egyptian Pryamid

Team 2:

Anna and Eric

A Little House

Team 3:

Willow and Nathan

A Castle

Team 4:

Nathanial and Sabrina

A Cathedral

Team 5:

Tais and Daniel

Santa Visiting a House

The Results:

5th Place!

4th Place!

How do I keep losing? That pyramid is awesome.

3rd Place!

2nd Place!

1st Place!

Here's to another fantastic WGC.

World Gingerbread Competition part 1

2011-12-12T10:18:00.000-08:00

So my roommates and I did a weird thing, we asked boys on a date. I know, I know, we're a bunch of feminist freaks.

We planned the most intense gingerbread house competition we could.

The Contestants:

TEAM 1: Me and Steven.

TEAM 2: Anna and Matt

TEAM 3: Willow and Jake

The rules:

Each team was given 30 minutes to build and decorate a gingerbread house.

After the 30 minutes of competition time expired two certified WGC(World Gingerbread Competition) judges arrived and examined the houses.

Shortly after the judge's departure the Master of Ceremonies arrived to announce 1st, 2nd, and 3rd place winners to the tune of "The Final Countdown."

The Masterpieces:

TEAM 1 - Rapunzel's Tower

TEAM 2 - Neuschwanstein

TEAM 3 - A Cathedral

It was a nail biter, but

The Results:

3rd place!

2nd place!

1st place!

We had fun, and we hope the boys did too.

USDA Approved

2011-11-30T15:41:00.001-08:00

The Dynasty Continues

2011-11-29T16:36:00.001-08:00

The political domination of the Stolworthy family continues! We are basically the Kennedys... because Al won her race! She is now President Ally Stolworthy of the sixth and seventh grade.

Congrats lady!

Mom and I went to watch Al give her campaign speech last Wednesday. We were considered guests, it felt good.

Somerset Middle School's election was completely dominated by girls. Seriously, there wasn't a single male candidate.

And there you have it. Somerset Middle School has officially joined the Ally Rally.

*Please excuse my GIANT thumb.

Thursday Night in PTown.

2011-11-18T11:22:00.001-08:00

I'm pretty sure I'm wearing a pajama top and Katie is wearing a 70s polo shirt,

but who doesn't love an ugly sweater party?

Jimmy who? Jimmy Choo.

2011-11-16T23:40:00.001-08:00

The Rack rarely disappoints.

Let me introduce you to my very first pair of Jimmy Choos.

(They say it's nice to meet you.)

It's ok to sleep in your shoes, right?

Join the Ally Rally

2011-11-14T23:31:00.001-08:00

Ally's making her political debut this week and I have no doubt her presidential campaign will be wildly successful.(It's in our blood.) A little taste of her strategy:

You don't need it Al, but good luck anyway!

Honesty, the brutal kind.

2011-11-12T11:02:00.001-08:00

Tell me you've been there.

You're at lunch, dinner, a movie, wherever, and a good friend of yours has invited a third party with the hopes you'll hit it off and all three of you can be besties. Now you're annoyed because third party may not want to analyze so-and-so from high school's baby's crazy hair, or talk about the misfortunes of your perpetually single brother. But for a moment you allow yourself to entertain the thought that this third party could be rad, and you could gain a new yoga partner/blog follower.

Until, your friend says, "You are going to love third party! You should know though, she is brutally honest, and I mean brutally honest."

As soon as those two words leave your friend's mouth, all hopes of a fantastically gossipy yoga partner or blog worshiper die.

Third party is rude.

Third party is rude, and instead of owning up to her bad manners, she's masquerading them as honesty. And you, you are going to have to sit through a lunch full of "Don't take this the wrong way..." or, "I just have to say...," or my personal favorite, "I'm just being honest..."

If there is the possibility that someone could take what you're saying the "wrong way"(aka the way it sounds, and most often exactly what you mean) - don't say it.

You don't have to say anything - keep that in mind.

And lastly, honesty and politeness are not mutually exclusive. Honesty also does not always mean speaking your mind - not all of your thoughts are diamonds.

Maybe you're thinking, "Honesty is the best policy Cate. What do you have against honesty huh? Do you like liars?! DO YOU WANT ME TO LIE CATE?!?!?!"

If you're thinking that, you are third party.

Listen, no one is asking you to lie through your teeth, or even to tell white lies. But sometimes, rather than saying what you think, just don't say anything at all. If the words that are about to emerge from your lips are not constructive, relative, informative, or kind, forget them before they offend everyone within a ten mile radius, or make someone cry.

Not caring what other people think isn't necessarily a character trait that deserves pride. Be proud of compassion and kindness, that way when people find out you're coming to lunch, they won't make up a hair appointment to avoid listening to you.

------

| | <-----That's my soap box. Don't worry, I've stepped down so we can talk about

shoes and be friends again.

Hello Disneyland.

2011-11-04T12:13:00.000-07:00

Thanks to Nevada day and no Friday classes I got to take a little trip with the fam. The pretzels at Disneyland have never been so delicious. I miss it (and them) already.

Do your family history.

2011-10-21T22:12:00.000-07:00

I'm the Temple and Family History committee chair in my ward. Aka I'm in charge of all things not related to your social life. We teach a family history class and attendance can generally be described as sparse. This is a little promo created to draw people in. Warning, I am a terrible actress/film editor.

An update, with 100 pictures.

2011-10-21T14:55:00.000-07:00

Things worth noting:

- I turned 21

- I will never own a Hyundai Accent, they're made out of plastic(rental car)

- Some kid tapped the hybrid's bumper, hence the rental car

- Kayla had a baby!

- Spiders rule our apartment

- I'm trying to learn german

- I'm going to Disneyland next week

Also, some pictures:

This is a real book, and only $6! What a steal!

Anna doing her calling. Those are FHE groups.

Mom and Dad came to visit!

I'm the healthiest person I know.

Me doing my calling, aka ward Temple trip.

Still the healthiest person I know.

Before the family history hike.

Sometimes Utah is pretty.

Roommates!

FH devotional.

Yay Stewart Falls!

LeAnn and Spencer carving pumpkins for FHE.

Anna hard at work.

I held the lid.

Pumpkin guts, yum.

So focused.

From left to right: Austria(the country), "Viva la France"(that's mine), and a spider web.

Dating 101: The Look Away

2011-10-13T13:04:00.000-07:00

I have 3 little sisters, and I hope to have a bunch of little girls. This is the first in a series of posts designed to impart my feminine wisdom with the hope that a.)they will think i'm the funniest, and b.) they won't do the same dumb crap I did.

Dating is a game.

Should it be? Absolutely not. But it is.

Every player has a few signature moves. One of mine is the "look away."

Here's how you do it: Find a guy(that you don't know) that has DP(Dating potential). Place yourself in his line of sight, but far enough away you can be doing something else. Talk to a roommate or something while periodically glancing at him. Eventually you'll meet his gaze. This little staring contest should only last 2 seconds. Don't smile, don't wink, don't frown, don't mouth "I love you," just meet his eyes for 2 seconds, and then go back to what you were doing.

Now don't do it a million times, just once or twice before you talk to him so that he notices you before you actually introduce yourself.

I've been practicing the look away on a DP, and finally introduced myself a couple days ago. I said I liked his shirt, he asked for my name, I said, "Cate."

Next day I run into him outside, we walk to class together, he asks for my name, I say, "Cate."

I see him later, I walk over and say hi, he asks for my name, I say, "Cate."

End of conversation comes, I say goodbye, he asks for my name. Again.

There are only two explanations for why he couldn't possible remember my name:

1. He has terrible manners and/or a terrible memory, Or

2. He was playing games of his own. The "too cool" game to be exact.

Tip: Nobody likes the people that are, "too cool." They're annoying, and pretentious. Don't be them.

Moral of the story little girls, the look away is a genius move, and if the guy tells you his name a couple times, remember it. But if a guy asks for your name 3 times, walk away. You know I did.

Singles Wards are punny.

2011-09-25T18:30:00.001-07:00

Stir in your mind, smooth out the details, be part of the blend ... plus a picture of a mixer?

Happy Birthday KT.

2011-09-12T22:26:00.000-07:00

Tonight we celebrated Katie's twenty-third birthday. Hip hip hooray! We tried to eat at Communal, turns out they're closed on Mondays.(Who does that?)

So we ate at Spark instead. I've been quick to rush to Spark's defense in the past, and I stand by their mocktails, those things are tasty. But seriously, the burger I ate was nast. So if you go there, don't get the Philly burger, only get the Berrytini.

We opted out of dessert at Spark(it probably would have been terrible), and instead fed Katie cake at The Chocolate. So delicious. Go there, or make a date take you there, and absolutely order the turtle brownie and a glass of milk.

Happy Birthday Katie!

Camping.

2011-09-11T23:13:00.000-07:00

Every once in a while it will feel like Provo is trying to strangle me, which is usually when I throw my toothbrush in the car and flee to Las Vegas. This time I fled to Lava Hot Springs, Idaho. Exotic, right? So exotic I'm probably going to have my destination wedding there.

We had a lovely time and I would just like to state that yes, we were actually camping(I slept outside in a sleeping bag) and yes, I have one million bug bites. The hot springs were pretty fantastic, much nicer than the ghetto ones you have to hike to. And I'm pretty sure their healing minerals have granted me immortality ... or at least soft feet.

It was a fun trip, I feel like I can breathe again, and I'm sure the smell of campfire smoke will wash out of my hair at some point.

Oh and I took maybe 5 pictures as we were packing up to go home. My bad.

The chair that goes anywhere.

We dress in matching outfits every Friday.

The car was really full.

Really, really full.

Yay Whitney!

Busy, Busy.

2011-09-03T12:05:00.000-07:00

So I've been busy being busy.

I took finals.

They were lame, but they're over.

I spent a few days in Vegas.

Good luck Kendall, welcome home Steveo, and it was good to see you Jess!

The Cheesecake Factory is delicious.

Miss her already.

Hilarious, right? That's my prom dress.

Good Luck Keno!

Awww Red Robin.

Dad was laughing at the app that makes you look bald.

Cute, cute.

We don't look related or anything ...

I lived out of my car for a few days.

I can fall asleep anywhere.

I spent a week in Park City with the Dad and Al.

Vacations are just so fun.

Auds came to visit, and I dressed up as Jason Mraz.

We got our toes painted and they banished Monica to the back.

Driving and posing. So safe.

Filming and driving? Even safer.

Al loves horses a lot more than I do.

SO CUTE.

I moved in to a somewhat new apartment.

I'm back at the Reynolds where parking is abundant, awkward mems are frequent, and Bishop Green still reigns supreme.

I got 3 new roommates.

They're fab. I'll showcase how fab they are in a little while.

I ate a tasty dinner with Mr. & Mrs. Cummings.

Seriously though, I had no idea avocados were so tasty.

I started school.

Long live political science.

I and my fellow Reynolds 102ers threw a party.

It was pretty successful, and we met some treasures. Also, Happy Birthday LeAnn!

The sign says, "Don't be a party pooper, come to #102."

I found out I can graduate in April.

Have you heard better news?! I haven't.

I signed up to take the GRE.

Hello graduate programs.

I went on some dates.

Can we just go back to prearranged marriages?

I built a shrine to my shoes.

Don't pretend to be surprised.

I crashed a bonfire.

It was full of Husband Hunters.

And now I'm blogging for the first time in a month.

You're welcome.

You guys, I have some good friends.

2011-08-18T13:34:00.000-07:00

How do I know I have good friends? Because this is me right now(just watch the first minute and a half):

I'm annoying. I know I'm annoying, but I talk anyway and they listen anyway. You guys are the best. Seriously.

I'll try and shut up now.

Goodbye U.A.C.

2011-08-11T09:01:00.001-07:00

I don't think it's any secret that I can be horrifyingly nostalgic and sentimental.

Usually I write some long, memory-filled post about all the wonderful things I learned in that place. I say goodbye to the things and people I love, and I talk about how things have changed. It's sappy and horrible.

Well this time, I'm all packed up to leave U.A.C., and I don't actually care. Sure, there are people that I'll miss, but I'm moving around the corner ... so I'm pretty sure I'll see them next week.

Do you know what I will not miss?

-How dark the kitchen is all the time.

-My roommates.

-Wedding stuff(not my wedding stuff, obviously) taking over the apartment.

-My satanic landlord.

-How funky the garbage disposal always smells.

-Walking 5 miles to take out the trash.

-The faulty drain in my shower.

-Trying to turn left on University Ave.

My indifference probably also has something to do with the fact that I'm not particularly excited about the apartment I'm moving in to. That's what random roommates will do to you.

So good riddance to U.A.C.

A Relationship Paradox

2011-08-06T10:16:00.000-07:00

Last night I was introduced to what the TAJ boys call "Man's Paradox." Only, they did tell me it can apply to women too. Basically, it means that your significant other can only possess two of the three qualities listed below. So if your boyfriend/husband/girlfriend/wife is emotionally stable and intelligent, they're most likely not good looking.

If I could choose(which you can't always), I'd pick intelligent and emotionally stable. This doesn't mean I can't appreciate a handsome man, it just means I can't handle dumb and emotionally unstable men.

What would you pick?

(P.S. - Am I the only one who had NEVER heard of this?)

Lingo

2011-07-27T16:11:00.000-07:00

Communication is a difficult thing, particularly when you're trying to bridge a generation gap.

Me: "Blah, blah, blah ...Yeah, he's such a hipster."

Tutu: "Oh, well you don't want that. Guys with big hips always gain weight after they get married."

Me: "Yeah, not what I meant."

For purely selfish reasons(I hate to be misunderstood), I've put together a list of practical, easy-to-understand definitions of the words/stereotypes/labels the kids are using these days. But before I continue,

1. This is not just for old people, I often get confused when people use the words hipster and indie so liberally.

2. Obviously I made these definitions up, so they're not actually from a legitimate source(Unless you consider me a legitimate source, then by all means, quote freely.)

3. This is not Urban Dictionary, it's 1000 times cooler. Besides the only people that still read Urban Dictionary are tweens and people that want to post a status about the definition of their name.

Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you .... today's slang(I just decided I hate the word slang):

Hipster - Hipster does not = Indie. Hipsters base their wardrobe, music taste, and behavior off what is "cool." AKA they're just trendy. Hipsters shamelessly hop on bandwagons like the Zooey Deschanel bangs, huge nerd glasses, TOMS, and shopping at D.I. Hipsters often look like Indie kids, because being Indie is cool all of a sudden(which should make it uncool...)

Indie - Unlike Hipsters, Indie kids base their wardrobe choices off their music tastes. They dress like their favorite musicians, which is why there are so many Tegan & Sara mullets, mustaches, and lumber jack plaid shirts running around. Basically they look like sweaty, homeless people and wear a lot of "vintage."

Bro - (Bro Ho is the female version, they just wear tank tops and booty shorts.)FYI, bro is pronounced more like bra. Bros(brothers? brethren? Name that movie.) wear logo t-shirts(like skate or bike or surf or motocross company logos), Dickie shorts or averagely skinny jeans, black or white socks that hit mid-calf, and Vans. They talk like they're permanently high, and are always fisting a Rockstar.

Tool - Generally tools are guys. Katie's been trying to coin the term "toolete," but I don't think it's working, kind of like the word fetch .... Gretchen. From a purely fashion standpoint it involves a lot of True Religion jeans, or just bedazzled jeans in general, Ed Hardy, fancy graphic tees, v-necks that show off how much time they spend at Gold's Gym, and a backwards baseball hat from summer sales. Personality traits: He loves himself, he loves dance parties, he loves himself, he loves energy drinks, GNC, random hook-ups, and he loves the gym. But most importantly, he loves himself, a lot.

Granola - I usually only use this word when talking about girls that don't wear make-up, curl their hair, and only wear Tevas and Chacos. Guys can be granola too though. It basically just means you're outdoorsy and love REI and hiking and bugs. Often times they're International Relations or Women's rights majors and they will not let you forget it. Trust.

Prep - Think J.Crew, Ralph Lauren, BR, Gap. Preps love Sperrys, driving moccasins, cardigans, gingham, bow ties, and tucking their shirts in. I think Prep is universally understood, it doesn't really change too much.

Hippie - Don't get this one confused with granola. Granola kids still buy their clothes at a regular store. Hippies make their clothes, wear recycled clothing, or go without clothes completely. Mostly they just don't wear shoes, or wash their hair, and they talk about third world countries a lot, but not in the trendy TOMS way. They also love to be self-righteously vegan.

Poser - Yeah I just brought this one back from 1999. It means people that try too hard to fit into one of the definitions listed above.

Are these definitions stereotypes? Yes. Are they sweeping generalizations? Yes.

But, now maybe when I tell Tutu some guy's a tool, she won't think he's a wrench.

Some Summer Fun

2011-07-26T08:25:00.001-07:00

Aside from the fact that I'm generally stuck in class 5 days a week(only 3 weeks left!), I have had a lot of fun. Naturally I've documented this fun with an iPhone/Instagram(so trendy) and not a real camera. Sorry.

First up, Typhoon and the Decemberists played at the Twilight Concert Series. I liked Typhoon better, the Decemberists were extra whiny and extra lame. Also we counted 63 pairs of TOMS. OUT OF CONTROL UTAH, OUT OF CONTROL. Also the waffle place wasn't taking cards and the cookie place was closed, so I had to eat ice cream. Blah, first world problems.

The stage from our trusty blanket.

Katie and I are not serious or dirty enough to be hipsters.

A Michael sandwich!

Friday I flew to Minneapolis, and found this guy at the SLC airport. Also the Denver airport and I are great friends, GREAT FRIENDS.

That is absolutely a braided mullet twisted up into a bun.

Once I made it to sweaty(humid) Minneapolis it was non-stop fun for 72 hours. We saw a little bit of downtown, went to the Mall of America, had several adventures using public transportation, saw H.M.S. Pinafore, watched fireworks, got rained on, and caught the last 2 songs of the U2 concert.

Caught.

Grant loving that we were at a musical.

Seriously funny, see it.

Love iPhone pictures.

In all seriousness, it was one fun weekend. Even the getting stuck in the rain part. I think I'm done with airports though, or at least riding next to unaccompanied minors that try to fight me for control of the arm rest.

PS - A random picture of Katie wearing a giant bowl as a hat.

You look like the 4th of July, it makes me want a hot dog real bad.

2011-07-09T08:47:00.000-07:00

The 4th of July is probably my favorite holiday. (I say probably because I also really love Christmas, and my birthday.)

This year Dad, Emily, and Ally came up to visit and celebrate with me! (Mom, Hailey, and their sensitive ears stayed home. They're coming to see me tomorrow.)

On Friday they came and picked me up from work and then with Shannon in tow, we ate at Happy Sumo. If you live in Provo or SLC and you haven't joined their VIP list, you should. Now.

Saturday we ate breakfast in great company and then went to visit SLC's "This Is The Place," monument. Later that night we celebrated Independence Day with David Archuletta and Brad Paisley at the Stadium of Fire. (There are no pictures of that.)

Emily at the Monument.

Emily being the Paparazzi. If she's not careful I'm going to freak out like Britney Spears did.

Em and I

Em, Ally and I

Dad and some girls

Al and I

Sunday, after we tortured Ally by making her sit through a singles ward testimony meeting, we watched 17 Miracles. Usually I'm not down with LDS films, but this one wasn't bad. It was about the Martin and Willie handcart companies, and it wasn't cheesy.

There's this one scene that I've been thinking about all week. After they cut their rations for the last time and it started to snow, one of the women decided she couldn't walk anymore, so she kissed her husband and children goodbye and she sat down on a rock and cried.

Maybe I am completely heartless and unsympathetic, but I was so disappointed in her. I wanted to yell at her to stand up and follow her family. I've obviously never walked more than a few miles, so I'm obviously not qualified to comment. I just know, that I never want to be that woman. When things get hard, I never want to the one to sit down on a rock, give up, and wait to die.

On a much much lighter note, we watched the parade on Monday! We also watched two old men fight at the parade, and then it was time to say goodbye.

I had such a fun weekend, Provo is always 1000000 times better when family's in town.

Want to see something gross?

2011-06-22T18:10:00.000-07:00

That is a pile of flies. (And a couple of bees.)

During the winter they foolishly trapped themselves between the screen and my window. Because they're flies, they weren't able to navigate their nasty little bodies to freedom, and they died.

That is a pile of dead flies.

My pillow is 8 inches from that window sill.

Gross.

iPhone pictures as of late:

2011-06-13T18:51:00.000-07:00

What happens when Grant pretends to be checking ESPN, but is really taking pictures:

Funny ward activities:

The power of words.

2011-06-12T21:51:00.000-07:00

I love words, and I love how precise and powerful words can be. Today, this poem was a welcome reminder of how beautiful the english language can be:

Invictus

BY WILLIAM ERNEST HENLEY

Out of the night that covers me,

Black as the pit from pole to pole,

I thank whatever gods may be

For my unconquerable soul.

In the fell clutch of circumstance

I have not winced nor cried aloud.

Under the bludgeonings of chance

My head is bloody, but unbowed.

Beyond this place of wrath and tears

Looms but the Horror of the shade,

And yet the menace of the years

Finds and shall find me unafraid.

It matters not how strait the gate,

How charged with punishments the scroll,

I am the master of my fate,

I am the captain of my soul.

Rando.

2011-06-02T09:51:00.000-07:00

So we went to Vegas for Memorial Day, I didn't take any pictures.

Spring term is over in 2 weeks!

Remember how I'm doing nothing exciting or fun this summer? Yeah me too.

My room is H-O-T, it is also M-E-S-S-Y.

While perusing J. Crew's sale tab I came across these two gems:

A denim jumpsuit and denim gaucho pants. It's like Baby Phat is collaborating with J. Crew. I feel so betrayed.

I also stole this from Collin's Facebook because it is hilarious.

"I feel happy of myself!"

Omama

2011-05-24T22:17:00.000-07:00

There are some things I just don't like. I can't really explain why I don't like them, I just know that I don't. Whipped cream, golf, and damask all fall under the I-hate-this-for-no-reason umbrella, and so does Michelle Obama. She hasn't offended me personally, or really said anything to make me dislike her, she just rubs me the wrong way. Which is why I find this photo so hilarious.

It's like Michelle is trying to explain to Kate that her bright pink SHINY bolero is super fashionable and Kate is like, yeah I don't really believe you, but I'll act charmed anyway. Those english, so polite.

Fail.

2011-05-22T16:43:00.000-07:00

In 6th grade I was just under 5 feet tall, I had braces and glasses, and knee caps bigger than my feet. My hobbies included reading, reading, and reading. We've already been over how I am not an athlete, so when I announced to my mother that I was trying out for cheerleading, you can imagine her surprise. Bless my mom's heart, she let me do it.

I went to four days of cheer boot camp, where I learned a slew of poorly rhymed chants, and crazy 8-count dances. Then I would go home and practice everything I had learned, 100 more times. I rattled chandeliers toe-touching off beds, and almost broke my mom's back, trying to get her to teach me how to do a back walk-over. I was in it, to win it.

Try-outs were held in the gym, primping was to be done in the locker room. Friday afternoon I walked straight into a mad house, a mad house run by cheer moms. My mom is a CPA, she was no where to be found. I went to the mirror, tied a red ribbon around my pony tail, covered my teeth in vaseline, pinned the number 12 to my shirt, and that was that.

I don't remember actually performing for the judges. I only remember taking one last breath of glitter-infused air, to try and slow my heartbeat, before running into the gym screaming like a mad woman.

The results were posted on the front door of the school at 5pm. I looked the paper up and down, no number 12. I thought I had just missed it, so I blinked a couple times and looked again. Tears started to blur my vision, and I realized there was not a one or a two anywhere on that paper.

Crushed, devastated, heart-broken, dramatic, hysterical, silly. All words you could have used to describe me. But it was middle school, so I was allowed to be all of those things. Before you jump to any conclusions, No, this didn't scar me for life, and No, it's not the worst thing to ever happen to me. It is however, the first time that I remember feeling like I had failed. I had done everything I could, and it still wasn't enough.

Failure's been on my mind, I'm afraid of it. I don't know many people who aren't. There are things I won't try and words I won't say, because I'm afraid to fail. A couple years ago, I found a quote by Winston Churchill:

Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.

I have failed at least 100 times since trying out for cheerleading, and I'm still alive. But sometimes I need to be reminded that it's the courage that counts.

Black + White

2011-05-21T10:46:00.000-07:00

I have a thing for bygone fashion photographers. John French is my favorite at the moment. He photographed clothes and socialites in the 1950s and 1960s, lucky man. Regardless of the fact that it's 2011, I want to look like these women all the time. Particularly the eyebrows, they're just so pretty.

See my obsession?

Tempted.

2011-05-11T17:25:00.000-07:00

To cut my hair like this.

Feel free to weigh in.

Lately + California.

2011-05-07T10:03:00.000-07:00

San Diego Zoo

The Cheesecake Factory

La Jolla

Emma's Bridal Shower

Never Say Never

We <3 Justin Bieber!

Jana's Wedding

Oh wait, it's not really spring.

2011-04-30T07:22:00.000-07:00

Just thought I'd share this with you:

It's April 30 and there is snow on the ground.

Things you don't do in Young Womens

2011-04-15T09:05:00.000-07:00

Auds and I participated in our very first pinewood derby last night. Maybe we only participated because we knew the prize was Yogurtland, maybe we didn't.

After we put the glitter on the little truck it started to look like some tricked out ghetto low-rider.

Auds worked feverishly on our sculptures.

They're a perfect likeness, and yes, I am that busty in real life.

Then we dressed up like Sandy from Grease, it was our official team uniform.

The Shoe raced better than we thought it would, but it ended up winning "Prettiest," and "Most Complicated," which we feel represents us pretty well.

And now Auds and I each have $10 to Yogurtland which is fantastic, because Yogurtland is the best. Especially the Toasted Coconut.

Also, this car was hilarious.

R K FIYAH or Arcade Fire ...

2011-04-12T11:26:00.000-07:00

Remember how I never blog because that little crapper of a laptop is the worst? Well my charger finally came in the mail! Yay for normal-sized laptops!

Emily came to town so we could go to the Arcade Fire concert and it was so great. So great! They were amazing live, and I got to dance it all out before finals start. Best hour and a half of my life. Here are some crappy pictures:

Oh, and then we went to Sonic because we were thirsty.

In other news, Grant and I went to St. George for the weekend and it was so fun. We only took one picture the entire weekend ... but hey, at least there's one.

Also, in 4 short days my finals will be all done and then I'm off to San Diego!

The iPhone documented our weekend.

2011-04-04T11:56:00.000-07:00

Last weekend we went to Vegas for Jana's second bridal shower and I only took four pictures the entire time. Not to mention they are iphone photos, so they are extra terrible. We had a really fun time though! And, I'll work on getting the pretty pictures from the shower. (The food was delicious.) Until then, four boring photos and a video:

Hailey is the cutest.

I know I look like a noob.

I need these sandals.

And this ring.

After the bridal shower was done, we spent our weekend doing things like this:

Or in other words, nothing.

I miss Las Vegas already.

The green-eyed monster is your friend, sometimes.

2011-03-21T19:38:00.000-07:00

I have a horrid landlord. Seriously, horrid. He constantly acts like he's doing us a favor by letting us live here. I'm pretty sure I pay you $390 a month buddy.

He also sends the most ridiculous emails. This last one was about him wanting to paint the spare bedrooms in our apartment. It said something to the effect of, "I'll begin painting the open bedrooms starting next week. The earliest I'll be there will be 10:00am, but more than likely it will be after 2:00pm."

That is basically the whole day.

At 8:30pm his shoes are still by the door. Leave already.

But, our lame landlord isn't really the point of this post.

While we were sitting on the couch trying to think of ways we could get him to leave, Audrey mentioned that her friend, let's call him the confederate, is super protective and would be more than happy to kick our landlord out.

Which got us thinking, when guys are protective of women they are automatically 100 times more manly. Like when they threaten to beat people up, or make sure your car is safe before a road trip, or make you walk on the inside of the road. Worrying is hot.

Do you know what else is hot? Jealousy. Not the obsessive, I'm-going-to-read-all-of-your-texts kind, but the normal kind. Like when a guy puts his arm around you in a "she's mine" kind of way. Or makes sure every one knows he's your boyfriend.

Normally I don't like being told what to do, but I am more than happy to listen to lectures about tire safety and walking home in the dark. A little manliness goes a long way.

B. Shower #1

2011-03-20T01:24:00.000-07:00

Lately, I have been a terrible blogger. I just don't have much to report. But, today Jana had bridal shower #1.

It took me one million years to get to Farmington. Ok, probably closer to an hour and a half, but still. FOREVER. I did listen to Glee the whole way up though, and by listen, I mean I belted every song I know. I also noticed that I never know the right lyrics to songs.

The real words were: The dog days are over, the dog days are done.

I sang: The dark days are over, the dark days are gone.

Not the same ... but that's fine.

Anyway after I got to Farmington (where there are actually farms), I ate as many brownies and cookies as I could, and I watched Jana open some presents! I also got to see Raiven! That girl is so funny, and if she's reading this, she and Carson need to move to Provo. Seriously. Right now.

Bad picture, but we were having fun.

There was good conversation to be had.

Shannon had a GREAT time.

Cute, cute girls.

Overall, it was a good time. And those brownies = heaven.

Oh, and if you receive one of these in the mail:

I will see you Friday for b. shower #2.

Scotland's Burning.

2011-03-14T13:32:00.000-07:00

Thursday night my computer charger caught on fire. Don't worry, I stomped it out. The nerds at Simply Mac informed me that they don't sell my charger anymore and they have no idea where I can find a new one. So until I can find one online, I'm using this crapper:

It is seriously miniature. It also refuses to play videos. GHETTO.

On a completely unrelated note, I found this gem today:

In high school we had a girls only club called the SS. We mostly baked brownies, wrote notes to each other, and tried to come up with ways to annoy the boys. Our pranks generally consisted of car paint, lacrosse stick theft, getting DMac to fake suspend them, and moving their trucks from their normal parking spots to the farthest spot possible. Once at Disneyland the boys named themselves the Lost Boys, and ran around Downtown Disney in a line. WEIRDOS. From then on the Lost Boys and the SS were at war. I don't remember what we did to warrant this love note, but it's a treasure. My favorite part is the you suck ^ on ice.

Dorm 4.

2011-03-13T13:18:00.000-07:00

At 10:30 on Saturday morning the Dorm 4 Divas were reunited! It had really been too long. Emma, Jenny, Laura, Macy, Audrey, and I met up at Kneader's to eat french toast, chocolate croissants, and reminisce. It was just like London, only we were all 10 pounds lighter, and half of us are engaged. It was so fun to catch up and hear about upcoming weddings. Macy needs to move to Provo so we can all get together more often. Dorm 4 Diva for life.

Home Decorating.

2011-03-07T20:00:00.000-08:00

This just made an appearance in our apartment. Audrey and I feel very strongly about word choice.

It has been 16 days since my last post.

2011-02-23T20:13:00.000-08:00

Plenty has happened, and naturally I do not have any pictures to share.

Most importantly Mom and Dad came to visit and we had a fabulous time. They came bearing the gift of girl scout cookies and in return, I introduced them to Texas Roadhouse. It was one fun weekend, I miss them already.

Valentine's Day weekend was a very pleasant surprise, but the half naked cupid was not.

Can you believe February is practically over? I'm not complaining, because really, it is time for this semester and this winter weather to be over.

There is a swimsuit on J. Crew.com that I should have purchased two weeks ago, because it is now sold out. I really hate when that happens.

Sarah's bridal shower was massive amounts of fun. Who doesn't love mini high school reunions?

Speaking of mini high school reunions, I spent most of Monday talking on the phone to Jessica and Kayla. I love them.

Arcade Fire & Janelle Monae will be in Orem. Dream come true.

The most perfect job just opened up, cross your fingers for me.

I want to go camping. I know, crazy. Who have I become?

All sorts of fun things are coming up, like bridal showers, bachelorette parties, and Audrey's St. Patrick's Day party. I promise to take pictures, and I promise not to be boring.

Until then:

The Kate Spade spring lookbook. I love it.

I can't wait to hear this voice in person.

Happy Chinese New Year!

2011-02-07T18:13:00.000-08:00

I don't really understand Zodiac signs, but apparently I was born in the year of the horse. Cool.

This is what the zodiac website has to say about us horses:

Horse

Those born under the Chinese Zodiac sign of the Horse love to roam free. They’re energetic, self-reliant, money-wise, and they enjoy traveling, love and intimacy. They’re great at seducing, sharp-witted, impatient and sometimes seen as a drifter. Compatible with Dog or Tiger.

I had no idea I was so wise with money, or that I'm so great at seducing. Dogs and Tigers come on over.

When in doubt, always blame the dog.

2011-02-05T11:30:00.000-08:00

Dad likes to joke that there's estrogen literally dripping from the walls of our house. If I were to ever see little drops of estrogen sliding down the wallpaper, I doubt I'd be very surprised. With 5 women(6 including or dog), girly behaviors are to be expected.

I was/am the test run. Mom and Dad knew to take the Barbie shoes off of the little girls' dolls, because I ate quite a few. Mom and Dad knew not to walk Emily into 6th grade, because they had mortified me 2 years earlier. Mom and dad knew never to let the little girls wear black eyeliner, because everyday for 2 years I left the house looking like I had rubbed coal all over my eyes.

I'm kind of rambling, but the point of this post is to tell you that I love being the oldest. I love that I came first, and I love that I got to be the test run. Mostly because of this story:

When I turned 16, all of a sudden I was allowed to invite boys over to "hang out." This had never happened in the Stolworthy house, and every time it did, believe me it was an event. Emily, Hailey, and Ally would parade in and out of the room telling embarrassing stories about me, blending things for no reason(other than to be annoying), and doing gymnastic tricks right in front of the t.v.

Usually I'd let them be crazy for 2.6 seconds and then yell, "Mooooooooooooooooom get them out of here."

Mature, I know. Mom doesn't reply to what she calls the "polish intercom system," so I usually had to go upstairs and hiss about how embarrassing my sisters were and beg my parents to put their children to bed. Mom and Dad would kind of roll their eyes(because I was ridiculously dramatic) and corral the little kids up stairs. One of the little girls managed to get out and sneak downstairs every time. I'm about 99% sure Dad was paying them to spy, but that's a debate for another time.

On this particular occasion Kayla Williams(Starbuck now) and I had a couple boys over to watch a movie. The little girls had finally left us alone, and we were trying to put the moves on these super hot guys.

Halfway through the movie we hear someone fart.

I blame Kayla, Kayla blames the dog, and we all just go back to watching the movie. It happens one more time, only we pass it off as a couch cushion noise.

Then it happens again, only this time louder and we just can't continue to ignore the trend. I blame Kayla again, she blames the dog again, and then we start to hear snickering.

We turn the lights on, and out rolls one of my sisters(I can't tell you which one) from underneath the coffee table. She had spying for an hour, and the only reason we found her is because she couldn't keep her farts to herself! My sister screams, "It was me, I farted! I farted 7 times!" and it was made abundantly clear, neither Kayla, nor the dog, was to blame.

This kind of precious blackmail, only comes about when you're the oldest, and it's stories like this one, I can't wait to tell future brother-in-laws. Payback little girls, pay back.

Words to live by, when you're a 32A.

2011-02-03T22:37:00.000-08:00

"There is more to sex appeal than just measurements. I don't need a bedroom to prove my womanliness. I can convey just as much sex appeal, picking apples off a tree or standing in the rain."
— Audrey Hepburn

It's so cute, I could die.

2011-02-02T20:19:00.000-08:00

I am aware that lately I have been a debbie downer. But today, I changed my screensaver/desktop picture, and all my problems are solved.

Every time I open my computer I see this:

The little puppy is waving hello! I dare you to not love it.

You are "Free to Choose" to make your eyes bleed.

2011-01-31T20:35:00.000-08:00

Monday is awful because ...

This morning I was supposed to go to the gym ... yeah, I didn't make it.

This afternoon I drove all the way to Murray to buy I book I do not want to read. I've been trying to listen to the audio version of Milton Friedman's "Free to Choose," but it puts me to sleep in 2.6 seconds. The book is literally giving me a headache. I can read novels thicker than this monster in less than a day, but I can not get past page 30 of this nightmare. If my eyeballs fall out, blame economics.

I made it to the gym in time to watch Gossip Girl on the treadmill. Only guess what? I can't find my headphones, so I had to read the captions. GG is lame when you CAN'T HEAR WHAT THEY'RE SAYING.

I don't care about Egypt, and people keep asking me about it.

Now that I have all the complaining out of my system, Monday is awesome because ...

I ate a classic italian sandwich from Quizno's, and it was heaven.

I still haven't had a drop of soda.

The people dirty dancing at Gold's are enough to make me pee my pants/fall off the treadmill.

By 5:00pm tomorrow I will be rid of that devil book.

On repeat.

2011-01-27T15:32:00.000-08:00

In high school I went through a huge country phase(I blame Tyson Williams, and Taylor Robb). I thought the phase was over, but Emily, Katie and I went to see Country Strong, and now I am stuck in a country phase part 2.

Mostly, these songs are on repeat:

You better believe I will be watching this country cheesefest 6 more times at the dollar theater.

(Wo)Man Code

2011-01-26T10:00:00.000-08:00

I think the Man Code is dumb. It lets guys keep ugly mustaches, wait 3 days to call, and feel entitled to forget your birthday. Although the execution is poor, the concept is valuable. Women need such a code, well-written of course, to protect friendships, balance back-stabbing, and check mood swings. I'd call all women to a convention in Philadelphia to draft an official charter, but we just don't have that kind of time. Born a dictator, I've made up my own, and am single-handedly ratifying it as the official Woman Code of the greater Provo area.

1. Any woman may point out another woman's mustache, or unibrow, without fear of penalty.

2. A woman may not ever blame "that time of the month" for catty, vindictive behavior.

3. The divulging of another woman's bad habits, in front of a handsome man, is strictly prohibited.

4. A woman does not call other women degrading names like "slut," "skank," "whore," or "B****."

5. No woman ever leaves her house without applying deodorant.

6. A woman does not wear cross trainers and jeans.

7. A woman does not name drop brands or ask the price.

8. If a woman's boyfriend/husband gets sick, she must at least pretend she made the soup.

9. A woman is only allowed to be 5 minutes late.

10. A woman never criticizes a friend's boyfriend, only nods when the friend brings up his idiotic behavior.

11. A woman never lets her friend leave the house dressed like a prostitute.

12. A woman does not mystic tan.

13. A woman is always grammatically correct.

14. A woman does not date a friend's ex-boyfriend, unless she has permission from said friend.

15. A woman does not chase after men, men come to her.

16. A woman does not wear Juicy sweatsuits, or anything bedazzled for that matter.

17. A woman writes thank you notes.

18. A woman does not text, call, or message ex-boyfriends to tell them she misses them.

19. A woman does not express an opinion, unless she is well versed in the topic of discussion, and can support her argument with fact.

20. A woman does not abuse her feminine charm. (Unless she needs basketball tickets.)

If any of these laws are broken the woman in question is stripped of her title, and will from then on be known as just a girl.

*Women are exempt from extending girls the courtesies extended to women. (Particularly the name calling.)

A Scandal For You.

2011-01-22T10:49:00.000-08:00

I started this blog my junior year of high school, and I don't even really know why. I didn't know what a blog was and there are only a couple posts from the "early" archives, and trust me, they're gems. I had to no idea what was a normal blog name, so I drew from what little real life experience I had, high school drama. In retrospect, probably not a good idea. I should have just been a cheese ball and picked "Caitlin's Corner," or "The Life and Times of a Teenage Mormon Girl in Sin City." Ok, maybe not, but, I ended up choosing Always A Scandal, because for some reason my life(at the time, and sometimes now) is scandalous/dramatic. Recently, no scandal, and no drama, so I can see where you'd be confused, but hopefully everything is cleared up-ish.

Anyway, I've decided to share a scandalous gem from high school with you. To preface this, you should know 1. I know my Prom dress looks like i'm wearing a t-shirt on top, I didn't have any sense of personal style then(just look at those earrings...), I've come a long way, I swear. 2. I know I have sunburns on my arms from going shooting and forgetting sunscreen.

On to the scandal. I went to my senior prom with Stevan Leavitt, and it was a fabulous time. To this day, the best date I have ever been on, in spite of what i'm going to show you...

This is our Prom group. Notice any similarities? I do. One black, silky, bunchy, sash around the waist similarity. We look like some weird Halloween wedding. Have you ever shown up at anything really, and been matching someone? It's awful. You know you look like twins, you're shooting each other death glares, and you're insisting to everyone that you bought/put it on first. And it's like 10 times worse at Prom. The dresses aren't exactly the same, but they're similar enough. Similar enough, I wanted her to fall in the pool, actually, I wanted to push her in the pool. Did it really matter that we looked so much the same? Yes. Do I still get angry every time I see these pictures? Yes. Is it immature of me to hold a grudge? Maybe, but let's be real, sometimes, I'm drama. This is one of those times.

**The black boxes are to protect the innocent and the not-so-innocent.

Home.

2011-01-17T23:04:00.001-08:00

I have been in Provo for one hour, and I already miss Las Vegas. I want to get in my car, grab a Red Bull, or five, and go back.

Not because it was 70 degrees there today.

Not because there's an unlimited supply of Junior Mints in the cupboard.

Not because I can sing at the top of my lungs, and no one will care.

Not because the DVR can record two t.v. shows at once.

Not because of my funny puppies.

Not because of my beautiful baby grand piano.

Not because my mattress on the floor of Dad's office is softer than my bed here.

Because my Mom is Las Vegas, my Dad is in Las Vegas, Hailey and Ally are in Las Vegas, and Emily is soon to be in Las Vegas. My family is not in Provo. My ugly room and clearly college apartment remind me every day that I am "on my own." Well being "on your own" is stupid. Yes, stupid. I don't like it. Plus, it was seriously 70 degrees in Las Vegas today.

I am not an athlete.

2011-01-12T15:00:00.001-08:00

Athlete

: a person who is trained or skilled in exercises, sports, or games requiring physical strength, agility, or stamina.

My lack of athletic ability is not a secret. I don't enjoy exercising, sports, or games that require running of any kind. I'm clumsy, and climbing the stairs south of campus leaves me gasping for breath.

My parents knew I lacked an affection for physical exertion when they signed me up for soccer in 1995. (Don't you love how much older that makes me sound? I do.) Dad was my coach, Jana Laidlaw and Danielle Whittle were my teammates, and we didn't win a single game. Part of it could be that as soon as they blew the whistle for kick off, I would hold hands with Danielle and Jana, and we'd run down the field together. We also had issues with picking dandelions instead of playing defense.

Soccer didn't really work, so in 8th grade I tried out for cheerleading. Cheerleading is ten times more girly than soccer, and we all thought I'd be better at it. Wrong. One afternoon while basing a basket toss, my partner Brittany came in to0 close and caught her braces on my cheek. Thirty seconds later Kylie Bickmore landed on my head. One broken middle finger later, I quit.

The summer before my sophomore year of high school, my friends convinced me to try out for cross country. I ran two miles, passed out, and then walked home because Mom wouldn't come pick me up. Not to mention, I have NEVER lived that down.

Eventually I found swimming. You don't get overheated, it's not a contact sport, and no one every really relied on me to do well. Win-Win. Don't jump to conclusions, I'm still not an athlete. I like to swim, but I'm not great. I really had to work for average times. We have several home videos of random swimmers my parents thought were me, but in actuality, I was several body lengths behind them. This is also why I quit swimming halfway through my senior year to be in the musical.

I took the color code test the other day and found out that I'm red/blue(big surprise), which means if something doesn't interest me, I'm not going to do it. Which would explain my poor gym attendance.

Why am I telling you all of this? To preface this video:

If you look carefully, you'll see me in the back, struggling on the monkey bars. Story of my life.

Hello 2011

2011-01-09T14:54:00.000-08:00

New Year's Eve is such a disappointment. The entire day, Facebook is full of status updates cursing the last year, and hoping the new year will be better. We review the year on all of our blogs, going over every meaningful event from the last twelve months. Then we get all fancy, like if we look hot at midnight, somehow the new year will be lucky. It's so silly the way we expect everything to change as soon as the clock flips from 11:59pm to 12:00am. Every last one of your problems is waiting for you when you wake up January 1.

But New Years is good for two things: Martinelli's, and resolutions. So, here are mine:

1. No soda for a whole year. And then I get to buy myself a pair of Louboutins.

2. Get into my program. It's about time I finished college.

3. Use my gym membership. I need to stop paying $30 a month to not use it.

4. Get a different job. Retail is so 2010.

5. Read the Book of Mormon every day. It's a good habit to have.

6. Read the Bible cover to cover. I haven't done it since high school.

7. Be smart. Sometimes when people talk to me they assume I only know things about shoes, clothes, and food. I can tell you all about the why Michael Steele won't be the GOP committee president for long, and how to improve your website's SEO. I'm not dumb, and I'm tired of people thinking I am.

8. Learn to do things I hate. Like run a 5k, or talk to people that intimidate me.

9. Make the Dinner Club blog famous. It's a good idea, and I'm going to make it happen.

10. Wear high heels. Even if it's to class on a Tuesday.

Hold me to these.

Dear 2010,

2010-12-31T13:34:00.000-08:00

We started off in London, and it was a lovely time. My blog was exciting, I got to see all sorts of fancy things, and I made friends with a whole dorm full of divas. It was the best 4 months of my life to date. Sadly, we left London for Provo, and I ended up working my summer away at APX. But, we got to live with Kayla and Katie(even if China arrived to crash our party), and make some crazy/fun/dramatic/noob friends. School started, we moved in to a new ward, and inherited the most dedicated home teachers to ever walk the earth. We also got to live with Audrey, Emily, and evetually a shrew. We celebrated halloween as celebrities, ate Thanksgiving at a delicious steakhouse, and survived the horrow of one more finals week. A great Harry Potter movie, accompanying a terrible ward choir, hundreds of trips to Wendy's, and a few shifts at the GAP were also thrown somewhere in there. Christmas happened in Las Vegas, a throat infection came to visit, and we got to see some of our old friends return home from missions and school. You weren't the easiest year, but you also weren't the hardest. If anything, you've changed things the most. My sweet grandpa won't see a single day of 2011, my family is one year older and that much different, my oldest and best friend is engaged, and my dear friend Sarah is having a baby. I've learned a lot, and also realized I don't know anything at all. I'm ready to say to goodby to you though, and good riddance to the last half of you.

Sincerely, Caitlin

The Great Photo Shoot of 2010.

2010-12-30T23:33:00.000-08:00

So we took family pictures. The cards still haven't gone out, but that's no big deal.

CW's new show.

I ruin poses like a pro.

Still ruining.

Apparently I make this face a lot.

She should make this face more often.

Dog poop.

All of Dad's girls.

Shirley Temple trying to be Marilyn Monroe.

Merry Christmas!

The Christmas Letter.

2010-12-09T16:32:00.000-08:00

Christmas cards are so hilarious, especially at my house. There generally tends to be a lot of pouting, crying, and I'm pretty sure blood was drawn last year. I really wish people could see the 5 frames before the actual photo we send out. Well, actually I don't, because that would be horribly embarrassing.

But, the hilarity of my family's Christmas photo is not the issue today. The issue is Christmas card letters. You know, the little insert tucked in between the impeccably photoshopped family, and the politically correct Christmas card. I do feel like before I continue I should make it clear that I love Christmas letters. I think that for the most part, they're sweet, and they make it possible for me to know what everyone's been up to for the last year. However, there are those that abuse the Christmas letter. Lately, more and more letters have turned into bragfests. They normally turn out like this:

Greetings from the Perfect family! We've had such a busy and exciting year! It's been so full of trips to Europe, award banquets, new cars, a brand new 13 bedroom home, a yacht, and a humanitarian trip to Africa!

Jim just made partner, has a corner office, and just upgraded his BMW. Jim also runs several non-profits, and was recently elected Governor. And, while he was serving as Bishop for the 15th time, he was released and called as Stake President, imagine that!

Carol is serving as President of the PTA, Stake Relief Society President, and is the Team Mom for the Kelly's soccer team, Joseph's football team, Natalie's tennis team, George's swim team, and Tiffany's golf team. She was also named Mother of the Year, and wrote a cookbook!

Kelly is a senior in high school, student body president, National Honor Society president, Prom Queen, Miss Teen USA, has a 4.9 GPA, led her soccer team to a state championship and was just accepted to Juilliard for piano performance!

Joseph is a junior in high school, captain of the football team, president of the debate club, Homecoming King, straight A student, volunteers at a local animal shelter every day after school, and even though he's been an eagle scout for 5 years, helps underprivileged boys earn their eagle scout!

Natalie is a sophomore in high school and has already won the state tennis championship twice! She also plays the violin Utah symphony, is simultaneously going to college, and is president of her Mia Maid class. Not to mention, she just won a nobel peace prize for her work in biology!

George is a freshmen in high school, but is set to graduate next year. He's been offered scholarships to Harvard, Yale, Stanford, and Brown. This summer George broke several world records in the pool, but still found time to go to his first stake dance!

Tiffany launched her own clothing and perfume line, won the PGA tournament, and is loving middle school! She's really looking forward to becoming a beehive, having Nike sponsor her next golf tour, and winning the National Merit Scholarship!

We hope your year was just as amazing and productive as ours was! We're looking forward to another year, and can't wait to update you again next Christmas! Happy Holidays!

Aren't the exclamation points great? It's the perfect punctuation to a perfectly pretentious sentence. I just want to hear about whether or not Betsey lost a tooth, spare me your shopping details. No one cares about your yacht.

My first boyfriend.

2010-12-07T16:35:00.000-08:00

There was a boy in Mrs. Tassiello's 3rd grade class, at Howard Wasden Elementary that I loved. His name was Brock Burns. Brock was a handsome, four foot nothing nine year old, with wavy black hair. His nickname was broccoli, but that didn't matter. Brock was the funniest boy in our class, and a peer mediator. He was perfect.

We would drive under freeway overpasses every day on our way to Howard Wasden, and every day I would hold my breath and make a wish. That wish was always, "please, please, please let Brock have a crush on me."

My wish came true on Valentine's day. While I was placing my Care Bears valentine's (from Albertson's) into a variety of shoe boxes disguised as mail boxes, Brock was gingerly setting a card and single red rose, wrapped in a paper towel, on my desk. I was overjoyed, but my face reflected the kind of indifference only a lady knows how to display. When I got to my desk, I noticed that Brock's card was not your average valentine. No, it was full-size greeting card. No other girl in class had a full-size card. Expensive gifts, Brock already knew the way to my heart. Inside the card read:

Dear Caitlin S,

Would you be my valentine?

Your secret admirer,

Brock

And just like that, we were an item. It came time for recess and me, wanting to impress my new suitor, climbed all the way to the top of the jungle gym. I was sitting on the pole right above the swinging rings, when the bell rang signaling the end of recess. I panicked. I had no idea how to get down. I was stuck and as I looked around for some kind of help, there was Brock, standing beneath me, arms open wide. He yelled at me to jump, that he would catch me. Mortified I said no, but at the same time I was terrified to be late for class. My heart started to pound as I weighed my options, and eventually decided that jumping off a pole six feet above my rescuer was a good idea.

All 65 pounds of me hit him square in the chest. I lifted my head, mouth full of sand, and saw Brock start to cry. Humiliated, I jumped up and ran back to class.

Brock and I broke up as soon as he caught his breath and finished wiping his tears.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how I ruined my first relationship. I haven't tried to literally squish a boyfriend since then, but sometimes I think that the full force of my personality and opinions can be compared to having an eight year old land on top of you.

Me and a family member + some ramblings.

2010-12-06T20:37:00.000-08:00

Can I just say that I am ready for this 30 day nonsense to be over. I don't like feeling obligated to post pictures. But, here we are:

I think this picture is hilarious. Mostly because Hailey and Emily look like they've been photoshopped in. They also look like that little fox from Dora the Explorer. Swiper, no swiping!

It's almost time for finals. If fact, my first final is tomorrow. I'm glad the semester is over, I need a vacation.

I miss the sun.

I'm obsessed with that snake game on Facebook. Literally, obsessed. I have to give myself time limits, or I will play it all day. Why is it so fun?

I can't find anything that I want for Christmas. Weird, right?

And to wrap it up, the greatest Christmas song ever:

The person I've been closest with the longest.

2010-12-03T17:15:00.000-08:00

Jana (no middle name) Laidlaw

We've dined together,

lost together,

won together,

been awkward together,

and been hookers together.

We're coming up on our 18th year anniversary, presh.

A picture that confuses me.

2010-12-02T23:07:00.000-08:00

It's actually a series of photos that confuse me. We had this strange photo shoot on my eighteenth birthday, and I still have no idea what we were doing, or why we were/are so weird.

PS: This challenge is getting on my nerves.

Something that makes me happy.

2010-12-01T15:46:00.000-08:00

Belgian waffles painted with chocolate and covered in strawberries and bananas. Why did I ever leave 27 Palace Court?

Somewhere I'd like to visit.

2010-11-30T15:27:00.000-08:00

Greece. I really want to go.

Someone(s) I miss.

2010-11-24T09:54:00.000-08:00

I am aware that I missed several days of this "challenge," but my blog, my rules. Thanksgiving break is such a tease. We spent ours in Arizona, and then the snow storm from h-e-double-hockey sticks ruined our plans to get back. One flight to SLC later I am in my apartment blogging about how I'm such a terrible blogger.

Anyway, I miss these fools. They're always good for a laugh or two.

Also, classes and finals will be all finished in 3 weeks. Thank goodness.

My Favorite Show.

2010-11-21T19:53:00.000-08:00

I am a nerd. Don't tell anyone. If it helps, Gossip Girl is my second favorite?

My Favorite Song

2010-11-21T02:05:00.000-08:00

Fly Me to the Moon. Greatest song ever written, sung by the greatest voice of all time. Plus this video makes me miss Vegas.

Who I'd trade places with for a day:

2010-11-19T16:20:00.000-08:00

This may sound weird, but I'd want to switch places with a mom. A mom with at least 3 kids. Anit-climatic? Maybe, but I just want to see if I would be able to handle it. I want to know if i'd be able to take a bunch of kids to Target and keep track of them all. Maybe I'll just volunteer to watch Kata's kids ...

Something I want to do before I die.

2010-11-19T09:30:00.000-08:00

I want to go to Fashion Week in Paris. Hopefully I'd get to see a handful of shows, but if I could only see two, I'd make sure I was at the Burberry show and the Chanel show. I want to be nudged right in between Kanye and an Olsen twin, while I covet every piece that's walked down the runway. It'd help if I could go dressed in a short little Burberry Porsum dress and a sky high pair of Louboutins.

Someone(s) I could never imagine my life without.

2010-11-17T16:42:00.000-08:00

Love them, can't imagine life without them.

Something I hate.

2010-11-17T01:09:00.000-08:00

Something I love.

2010-11-15T20:51:00.000-08:00

Celebrity Crush.

2010-11-14T14:27:00.000-08:00

Joseph Gordon-Levitt

The guy knows how to dress.

Someone I see myself marrying.

2010-11-13T18:48:00.000-08:00

Zac Efron really loves me, NOT Vanessa Hudgens. He just doesn't know it yet ...

The people that have gotten me through the most.

2010-11-12T22:46:00.000-08:00

They're the best.

A picture that makes me laugh.

2010-11-11T18:29:00.000-08:00

Sam(the little brother we never wanted) dousing us with an ice cold water bottle, while we were trying to warm up before our relay. Don't let the sun fool you, it was February.

Someone(s) that had the biggest impact on me.

2010-11-10T19:33:00.000-08:00

I am so lucky Sarah Anderson, or I guess Sarah Passey these days, let me each lunch with her the first day of freshmen year. I was so scared, and I was so afraid that i'd have to eat my lunch in the bathroom. Sarah saved me from that embarrassment though, and then Alana transferred to Mojave and suddenly I had a this nice big group friends. I didn't know them all that well at first, but student council, swim team, and a bunch of classes helped me get to know them better. Parker and I were in homecoming court together and when we both lost, vowed it was rigged. Taylor watched me fall on my butt in the courtyard at Mojave and graciously ignored it. Sarah and I had 1000 heart to hearts at a variety of fast food establishments. Kendall and I were swim team captains and had nice long chats on the bus to meets. Jesse always knew how to make me feel like I was looking good. Raiven made the laurel class hilarious, and her faith strengthened my testimony so much. Wesley was my first dance and first date. Jess and I cried everything out, together. Alana and I made plans, set goals, and ate buckets of cookie dough. Steve-O was the best prom date ever. Jana came to every Legacy event in the history of the world, and she didn't even go there. Atkin had a knack for telling me to stop being so dramatic. Kayla was my long lost twin, and the only one that put up with my love for high school musical, tropical smoothie, and colbie callait. Tyson had a real talent for getting on my nerves, but at the same time knew me better than anyone. Each of their personalities made a big impact on me, and I'm so lucky that I got to know them, and that they know me.

Give and Get is Here!

2010-11-10T12:09:00.000-08:00

Go to Gap.com, shop around, click the link below, and then thank me later.

Give and Get is Here!: "Enjoy 30% off from November 11-14 at Gap, Banana Republic and Old Navy plus we'll make a 5% donation to a non-profit."

My True Self.

2010-11-09T14:35:00.000-08:00

My true self is a toss up between these two pictures:

Red lipstick, baked potato, Coke Caitlin.

And

Trophy wife Caitlin(kidding, mostly.)

Places I've Been

2010-11-08T15:54:00.001-08:00

London

Paris

Dublin

Rome

A habit I wish I didn't have.

2010-11-07T14:44:00.000-08:00

I love Coke. I drink it at almost every meal. I go through the McDonalds drive-thru at least once a day and order one large Coke. Sometimes I buy a Coke on Saturday, so that I can drink a Coke on Sunday, and not break the Sabbath. I wish I didn't love it so much.

My Craziest Friend

2010-11-06T09:46:00.000-07:00

Alana Lee. She's not a crazy person, but together we just lose it. Like the time neither one of us had a license, but we took casey's truck for a ride anyway. Or the time we stayed out until midnight on a Thursday and then blew through every red light on Ann Rd. Or the time she dared me to kiss Jesse Buck. Or the time we ate an entire costco-sized tub of cookie dough. Or the time Jessica and I got stranded in St. George, we shoved snow down each others' pants, and then all slept in the same twin bed. Or the time I was driving through St. George, we met up for lunch, and 3 hours later were still talking. Or the time we were seniors in high school and trying to hook up with RMs. Long story short, life is so much more exciting with Alana. And, the best part is, we can go months without seeing each other and pick up the crazy exactly where we left off.

A Really Good Memory

2010-11-05T15:48:00.000-07:00

I have a pretty good memory, particularly when it comes to things that don't matter. Weird little facts about politics, shoes, and food take up all my memory space. And, I remember a lot of things that I don't consider super important until much later. For instance, one friday night at heritage halls Michael Pulsipher, Trent Earl, Jana Laidlaw, Michael Buckley and I all made salsa and watched Disturbia. It sounds pretty average, but I've never had so much fun. It helps that they were all individually funny, and together hilarious. We laughed until we were red in the face, we had to run to the bathroom on more than one occasion, and at least 2 people spewed salsa all over the rest of us. We probably told 150 stories about life-guarding, bee-keeping, BYU, and dating. Even as I'm re-reading this post, I realize how ridiculously average it sounds, but I'll remember that conversation forever. Funny friends are the best friends.

I'm a follower.

2010-11-04T23:45:00.000-07:00

I take online quizzes.

I fill out questionnaires.

I retweet.

If someone tells me to pass on a message via FB status, I do it.

I love internet fads.

Here's the latest:

Post 30 days in a row:

Day 01 - A recent photo of you and 15 interesting facts about yourself

Day 02 - A really good memory.

Day 03 - A picture of you and your craziest friend

Day 04 - A habit that you wish you didn't have

Day 05 - A picture of somewhere you've been to

Day 06 - A picture that shows your true self

Day 07 - A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you

Day 08 - A picture that makes you laugh

Day 09 - A picture of the person who has gotten you through the most

Day 10 - A picture of someone you see yourself marrying/being with in the future

Day 11 - Your celebrity crush

Day 12 - A picture of something you love

Day 13 - A picture of something you hate

Day 14 - Picture of someone you could never imagine your life without

Day 15 - A picture of something you want to do before you die

Day 16 - Someone you would want to switch lives w/ for one day and why

Day 17 - Your favorite song

Day 18 - A picture of the cast of your favourite show.

Day 19 - A picture of someone you miss

Day 20 - A picture of somewhere you'd love to travel

Day 21 - A picture of something that makes you happy

Day 22 - A picture that confuses you

Day 23 - A picture of you and the person you have been closest with the longest

Day 24- A picture of yourself and a family member

Day 25 - Picture of yourself and a family member

Day 26 - A picture of something that means alot to you.

Day 27 - A picture of something your afraid of

Day 28 - A picture of you last year and now, how have you changed since then?

Day 29 - A picture that can always make you smile

Day 30 - Who are you?

I'm excited!

Day one:

1. Potatoes are my favorite food.

2. I'm terrified of bugs.

3. I love pop culture.

4. I can spot a fake Louis Vuitton from miles away.

5. I sleep with my contacts in.

6. I snore, softly.

7. I'd much rather be hot, than cold.

8. The 4th of July is my second favorite holiday, after Christmas.

9. My feet are as big as Frank Sinatra's.

10. I can give a hearty laugh on cue.

11. I want to live in London for the rest of my life.

12. The characters at Disneyland freak me out.

13. I read the New York Times every day.

14. I hate riding in the back seats of cars.

15. I never drink diet soda.

A sad day.

2010-10-26T15:10:00.000-07:00

My sweet grandpa passed away about a week ago. I was debating whether or not it's even appropriate for me to write on a blog about something so unbelievably personal, but a tribute is a tribute, right?

Papa had a heart attack, and even though my brave little grandma rushed him to the hospital, his tired heart didn't make it. Emily and I flew down to Las Vegas this weekend to help get ready for the funeral, and it was an odd experience. I've never lost anyone particularly close to me, at least not at an age where I understood, and it was all a bit surreal. Everything from reading his obituary to finding old photos to display was enveloped in this quiet sadness, that all the hugs in the world couldn't fix. Monday was a pretty day for a funeral, but when we walked outside it was super windy and my mom started to laugh. She said she'd bet me $5 that if grandpa were there he'd say, "Damn wind. Look at it mess up my 3 hairs." Somehow that set the mood for the day, and we just decided to say what grandpa would say and do what grandpa would do. In true Robert Wilcox fashion we drank Coke, ate hot dogs from Costco, and grabbed as many chocolate chip cookies as we could carry.

Papa was a popular guy. The benches of the chapel were lined with old students, old athletes, old friends, and a few of the little kids he liked to scare/tease. I only knew him for 20 of his 80 years and the more stories I heard, the more obvious it became, that I had only experienced a small part of his Legacy. Listening to so many people talk about how he had influenced them for the better got me thinking about how Papa had changed my life and changed me. He taught me a few very important things.

1. The Yankees are the greatest team to ever play baseball.

2. Coke is always the beverage of choice.

3. Frank Sinatra is real music.

4. Never hide your legs.

5. There is never any substitute for hard work.

6. Red roses are the only roses to buy.

7. You love unconditionally.

I have a very real testimony of the plan of happiness and the Atonement. I know with a surety that he is in a much better place, and very likely making fun of me for shedding as many tears as I have. But, I will always miss him asking me to swap his diet Coke for real Coke, calling me "legs," his famous "what are you looking at?", swatting my butt with his cane, asking me if I was working hard, and telling me that he loves me. Our little family will remain incomplete for a little while, and we'll definitely miss him. But, there's a peace that comes from knowing that we'll get to see him again, and punch him in the arm for his terrible timing.

The anticipation is killing me.

2010-10-12T09:12:00.000-07:00

Saturday we are going to Disneyland! The anticipation is literally killing me.

I want to eat 6 of these,

100 of these,

wear this around the park,

And watch a parade!! I'm so excited!

Dad comes to town.

2010-10-11T19:46:00.000-07:00

This weekend Dad paid us a little visit. He brought me a new phone(that I love.) And it has a hilarious app that makes me look like this:

Clearly what I would look like if waffles were still around the corner.

Saturday we walked over to Sensuous Sandwich and then walked over to the stadium because we had tickets to the BYU game. It was very clear they only won because I was there. They seriously played like crap. After the game we walked over to Gloria's for dinner, and we've all decided it is overrated. We ended the night with hazelnut hot chocolate and a movie! We saw Life As We Know It, and it was very cute. Dad is so good to us.

Sunday we went to church and then met Dad in Salt Lake. We decided to be tourists for a day, and paid a visit to the state capitol and the Salt Lake City Cemetery.

Monday we ate at Sensuous Sandwich again(Dad really liked it,) and then said our goodbyes. Provo gets 1000 times better when parents come to visit.

Thanks Mom, I owe you one.

2010-09-29T21:59:00.000-07:00

I am 2o years old! Hooray! When I woke up yesterday I definitely felt older, and wiser too. Auds is the best and turned our apartment into Birthdayland! Complete with streamers, balloons, a delectable dessert, and a maple bar! Perfect. I had a shift at the GAP, a couple classes, a group project, a pretty surprise and a delicious dinner at Happy Sumo! Great day.

Birthdayland.

2o.

2010-09-27T11:54:00.000-07:00

Wednesday I turn 2o, hooray! Saturday Katie, Monica, and I combined our birthday celebrations and had a little picnic in the park.

We had lots of tasty treats and

fun decorations.(I flashed Monica 9 times.)

We are so weird/hilarious.

Birthday girls + Sidney + Auds

The candles were crazy.

I am never any help when it comes to these things.

Favorite picture of the afternoon.

Auds and I.

Remember when were babies?

Most awkward picture of the day.

Did we have a good time?

Yes, we had a very good time.

Hailey's in High School.

2010-09-19T19:51:00.000-07:00

It's official, Hailey's in high school. Here's the proof:

She's going to dominate. Stolworthy girls were born to be politicians.

Sooooo,

2010-09-19T01:06:00.000-07:00

We went to Vegas. I don't have any pictures, because I'm a dummy and forgot my camera. Story of my undocumented life.

Dad's dinner was a big success! I pushed Papa up, down, all around, and kept him well hydrated/caffeinated. I left the silent auction empty-handed, but I guess when you're bidding against the woman who owns Circus Circus, that is to be expected. It was sad to see this cycle of "I Have A Dream," end, but very cool to see how far everybody has come. Dad's a great example, someday I want to participate in non-profit like his. All in all it was a fine evening. We did have a slight technical issue when Papa's wheelchair started picking up speed down the convention center ramp. I'm pretty sure we were clocked at 15 mph. I'm also pretty sure he enjoyed the sudden increase of speed.

Back in Provo big things have been happening.

I got into the student-run Bradley PR Agency, and I'm really looking forward to working on an account!

I finally unpacked my Broadway posters, jewelry stand, and stapler, which officially makes my room complete.

I added a few new words to the I-hate-these-ugly-words list:

Nostril- gross

Lick- nasty

Epic- too often misused

Singlet- bad memories

Em, Auds, Katie and I saw Easy A. It was hilarious, and I would see it 9 more times.

We all learned Katie does a great Evanescence impersonation.

We also learned smiley fries are tasty and creepy.

And I've been working a lot. Speaking of, tonight a couple of ladies came in and ransacked the place, while simultaneously pushing a dog in a stroller. Honestly, I love treating dogs like humans. I love when dogs wear clothes, I love when dogs shake hands, and I love when dogs sing or talk. But seriously, a stroller? A bit much. They got to the counter to pay and we were having some issues because she had forgotten that her GAP card had been totally maxed out. I told her that you can't use the coupons unless you use the card to pay, to which she replied, "You're pissing me off." Uh, sorry? Sorry you didn't read the email, sorry your spending habits are out of control, and sorry you think your dog is a baby. Long story short, she didn't buy anything. In fact, when she found out she couldn't have the 25% off, she threw the clothes at me and told me she hated me. Anyway, it's really hard to make storming out of a GAP look dignified when you're pushing a dog in a stroller, I wouldn't recommend it.

Dad is coming tomorrow! Yay!

Ps- Horoscopes are stupid.

Pps- I wish BYU would win a game, i'm starting to feel embarrassed.

Ppps- Look at what they sell on the internet:

What is that baby looking at? WHY IS THERE A MARKET FOR A PRODUCT LIKE THIS?!?!?!

9/11

2010-09-11T14:40:00.000-07:00

“Time is passing. Yet, for the United States of America, there will be no forgetting September the 11th. We will remember every rescuer who died in honor. We will remember every family that lives in grief. We will remember the fire and ash, the last phone calls, the funerals of the children. “- President George W. Bush

Be back in a bit.

2010-09-10T14:09:00.000-07:00

Headed to Vegas for the weekend.